Welcome One and All,
I must say I was disappointed in the less than enthusiastic response I got from last Fridays blog. Dave assures me you are out there but the under whelming number of comments I received last week were a little disheartening. I am a man of my Word and so I promised to blog for Dave every Friday. So you’re stuck with me for now.
Last week I introduced in a round about way my sidekick Mr.Mojo. Who will be quite prominent today, in case you haven’t noticed it is Friday the 13th. Mr. Mojo and myself will help guide you through this most unlucky of days.
Let’s begin with the basics. You should not change your bed on this day because it brings bad dreams. If you pass a funeral procession on this day some one will die on the following day. If you cut your hair a family member will die. Trim your nails and bad luck will surely follow. Never start a journey, a business, set sail, or consult an astrologer on this day. If you were unlucky enough to have been born on Friday the Thirteenth you should pick yourself out a nice cardboard box and live under a bridge.
While we are exorcising caution, I must also warn the more common faux pas are multiplied ten fold on this day. For example if you break a mirror forget seven years, you’re in for seventy years of bad luck. See a pin, you best pick it up. Always leave through the door you enter from. For the knitters out there, you should not leave a project unfinished or the intended recipient will have bad luck. I could go on here, but you have your own superstitions and I will let you wrestle with those as best you can.
If you are of the camp scoffers, allow me to run some numbers by you.
More than 80 percent of high-rises lack a 13th floor. Many airports skip the 13th gate. Airplanes have no 13th aisle. Hospitals and hotels regularly have no room number 13. Italians omit the number 13 from their national lottery. On streets in Florence, Italy, the house between number 12 and 14 is addressed as 12 and a half. Many cities do not have a 13th Street or a 13th Avenue. In France, socialites known as the quatorziens (fourteeners) once made themselves available as 14th guests to keep a dinner party from an unlucky fate. Many triskaidekaphobes, as those who fear the unlucky integer are known, point to the ill-fated mission to the moon, Apollo 13.
According to the Stress Management Center and Phobia Institute in Asheville, North Carolina, an estimated 17 to 21 million people in the U.S. are affected by a fear of this day.
If you have 13 letters in your name, you will have the devil’s luck. Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer, Theodore Bundy and Albert De Salvo and David Benneman all have 13 letters in their names. I ask you, is this all coincidence? I fear not.
So while you are merrily reading this post I will be safely hunkered down in a cave, inside a circle of salt, sleeping with my head to the north, clutching a rabbit’s foot. My clothes will be worn inside out to keep evil spirits at bay. I will abstain from using any and all technology on that day. Cars, computers, phones, and the internet are certain paths to the destruction of your soul. Even two cans and a string can lead the forces of evil to your door on Friday the Thirteen. I’m risking a fire in the cave, but rest assured I’ll be knocking three times on each piece of wood I sacrifice to the gods of warmth and light.
I advise you to take heed, unless you are the seventh son of a seventh son, today will test you.
The old crone next door is having a sale on charms and spells for the holiday. I bought this warthog tusk from her. It may not be pretty, but she guaranteed it will keep me safe.
Todays Quote comes from the blues song Born Under A Bad Sign, lyrics penned by William Bell.
“Born under a bad sign, been down since I began to crawl, If it wasn’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have no luck at all”
Thanks for dropping by. If I missed any of your favorite superstitions please leave them in comments.
P.S. I’m actually posting this on Thursday as I will not be available on Friday.